Something to Think About

***WARNING: if you are easily offended you might want to skip this post.  I get a bit preachy.***

As most of you know, my brother Wes has Down Syndrome.

He's a handsome guy if I'm allowed to say so.  But aside from his dashing good looks, he's also one of the sweetest people I've ever met. 

All he wants in life is acceptance,

for who he is,

Wesley Kocher.

Not acceptance with a caveat of someone who is disabled.

Not acceptance with a side of pity because he is mentally delayed.

Just acceptance.

He's so willing to help.

He forgives almost instantly.

He never holds a grudge.

He's the first to introduce himself. 

And he's so patient and PROUD of his niece.

2009

2010

2011

He has a great attitude and fun personality.

Wes LOVES to make you laugh.

Not afraid to be silly either.

And never once has he questioned WHY he was born with an extra chromosome. He doesn't care. He is doing the best he can and making the most out of the hand he was dealt.

I may be older than Wes, but I definitely look up to him.

He and I have something in common: 

we are both dealing with something that is out of our hands.

He didn't ASK to be different.

I didn't ASK to get lupus.

He didn't DO anything to create an extra chromosome.

I didn't DO anything to make my immune system not work.

He CAN'T explain what it's like to be Down Syndrome.

I can't explain what it's REALLY like to have lupus.

He doesn't have a CURE for Down Syndrome.

I don't have a CURE for Lupus.

And yet, there are some, that will judge, ridicule, poke fun, and disrespect anyway.  I have heard the word "retarded" used out of context my entire life. 

I have heard it from:

complete strangers, friends of mine, friends of the family, and yes, even family members (close family members).

My amazing brother (and ROLE MODEL) lets it roll right off his shoulders.  Doesn't even give it air to breathe. 

And he knows when some one is making fun of him. 

He may be mentally delayed, but he's not stupid. 

He has feelings. 

He understands a lot more than people give him credit. 

But he holds his head high and keeps on walking to the beat of his own drum.

I love that about him.  And the next time he sees you, he won't hold it against you that you used the word out of context.  He's already forgiven you.

I sure wish I could be more like him.  Though I won't say anything to you, nor will I let you even know that that word used out of context is like "nails on a chalkboard" to me.  It stays with me.  And it makes me sad.

Mainly sad for you.  Because you are obviously missing God's whole purpose in putting Wes in our life.  Wes is here to bless us, teach us, humble us, and love us.

I've heard so many reasons why people who say it, justify it:

•  "It's not directed AT him."

•  "I don't mean anything by it."

•  "If I stopped saying every word that could be offensive, I wouldn't have any words left."

•  "You should focus on bigger problems than the misuse of ONE word."

•  "It's just a word."

I respect your Freedom of Speech, you are certainly entitled to use the words of your choice. 

I hope you are respecting my freedom to speak freely in this post as well, hear me out.

The next time you want to say something is "retarded", please exercise your vocabulary, think about how it "could" be offensive to someone and kindly choose a different word.  After all, it is JUST a word, right? Can easily be replaced with something else?

Because unless you are using it to describe something that is truly a gift from God, you are probably using it out of context.

Thanks for keeping an open mind and reading all the way to the end.  My intent for this post was not to offend anyone, simply to raise awareness for the misuse of the "r" word.  I'd love to hear your thoughts, please leave a comment below.