Happy Mother's Day & World Lupus Day

Two things that impact my life the most, being a mother and having lupus, are celebrated on the same day this year!

Both have very special meanings for me.  

Mother's Day is a great day to reflect on those that have been a "mother" to me.  I believe it takes a village to raise a child.  One person can not do it by themselves.  There's just so much to teach and learn.  Some of these "mother's" have been friends, teachers, coaches, cousins, aunts, grandmas, and of course my own mom and step-mom.  I have been able to watch and glean from them, all their positives and negatives.  And I value both ends of the spectrum of these precious life lessons, because without seeing the bad, sometimes we can not appreciate the good.

My girls are also fortunate to have lots of "mother" figures helping raise them.  Each beautiful lady adds to the nurturing and molding of their lives.  And what a blessing it has been to see the different characteristics take shape into Emma and Brooklyn's unique personalities!

And of course, it is hard to reflect on the influence these wonderful ladies are having on them, without taking a very close look at what my particular contribution is on my daughters.  

Am I measuring up?  

Am I creating a loving, nurturing environment for them to truly grow?

What impact is a mother with lupus having on their childhood?

What impact is all the medication that I have to take on a daily basis, having on these girls?

I think the one thing most people don't understand or truly appreciate, is just how much the medication to treat lupus, affects the psychology of the person taking it.

Sure we all have bad days.  We all have moods swings.  We all have moments of saying the wrong thing.  But when your day can't even start until you've taken a handful of meds that are known to create brain fog, agitation, aggression, irritability... factors that can make the most trivial of situations, get blown out of proportion?  What impact does that have on them?

And unfortunately, my girls have never known me without having lupus.  

They have never known me not on all these medications.

So again, I have to wonder, what impact is it having on these girls?

Luckily, for me, they only know how to show one kind of love, unconditional love.  They show me never-ending patience, understanding, and acceptance, even at my worst.  

They do not judge me.  

They do not hold it against me.  

They do not feel like I'm attacking them.  

They are always waiting with open arms, 

to comfort me, love me, and accept me for who I am,

They learned that from their Dad.  

Brian has showed them through his actions how to love someone with a chronic illness. How to help someone get through a rough morning when they are in constant pain.  How to just "be" there, when that person needs it most.

I guess until you have walked this path and been down this road, you can't fully appreciate the daily struggle of living with a chronic illness.  Of trying to appear to have your ducks in a row and act "normal".  And even when you think you actually do have it all together, sometimes, things just don't go the way you planned or come out the way you wanted... and that's just life.  Chronic illness or not. 

I'm just incredibly grateful that my daughters seem to "get it"  And for that I am forever blessed to be their Mother, who at the same time also has lupus.   

To all mother's and mother figures out there, 

And to all my fellow lupus warriors, 

If you'd like to know more about lupus, please visit the Lupus Foundation of America's website, they are posting a fact of the day for the entire month of May.

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